It’s kind of surprising to see a horror film like Evil Dead in 2013. After Wes Craven re-wrote the rules with the self knowing Scream back in 1996 and then The Cabin in the Woods more recently deconstructed the genre further, I thought the attitudes on display here were a thing of the past. Evil Dead is a giant step backward to the naïveté of the 1980s. Here we’re presented another group of kids playing about in the woods. They behave like idiots, existing so they can be dismembered, killed, and gutted in the most gruesome methods possible. It’s gross yes, but it’s certainly not scary. Ok so this is a “remake” of Sam Raimi’s highly regarded cult film that inadvertently became a camp classic. The cartoon violence was over the top and had, let’s face it, special effects that were so bad you had to laugh. C’mon! The blood looked like grape jelly. But this is a remake in name only. Other than the basic underlying story, this is much different. Its “improvement” is that the torture actually looks real. Evil Dead has technically superior gut churning violence but it’s utterly lacking in spirit, charm, humor or scares.
The plot is simple. A group of 5 friends meet up in an old abandoned cabin in the woods. Mayhem ensues. Why are these cabins always built in some remote area with only one road in and no human contact for miles? Apparently this is where Mia and David’s mother battled with insanity. And they want to spend more time there? The friends are helping Mia kick her drug addiction. In order to detox and get clean they must keep her there regardless of how much she wants to leave. That’s an inspired rule and the script’s lone bit of intelligence. Despite the fact that the kids are a bunch of morons, I will clarify that their acting is fine. These young adults act appropriately scared. That’s all we require in a product like this. Its unfortunate they serve an inferior story.
Haven’t we seen this before? 5 people are terrorized and then behave in ways so stupid, it boggles the mind. Seriously if I felt any modicum of fear it was that I might roll my eyes to death. First the whole gang stumbles upon a secret cellar under the cabin filled with what looks like decaying cat carcasses hanging from the ceiling. They don’t leave. Then Eric, the biggest idiot, finds a book made of skin with barbed wire all around it that says “Do not open” so naturally he proceeds to open it. Then starts reciting spells that should not be spoken. Mia is subsequently attacked by a tree in a scene that is surprisingly tame compared to the original. She gets possessed and then starts killing everyone in sight. At this point we couldn’t care less about these people. I mean they practically asked for it. Projectile vomiting (The Exorcist), a demonic girl curses creatively (The Exorcist again), nail guns, carving knives – the film is a smorgasbord of atrocities served up to an audience jaded by years of blood and guts. They demand the ante be raised and this will satiate their bloodlust. One guy in the theater literally hooted and hollered every time someone was mutilated. Debating the merits of this flick is pointless. Your enjoyment will depend on whether you enjoy watching people cut, disremembered, slashed in the most sadistic ways possible. I love scary movies, but this wasn’t frightening in the least. It’s gleefully gross and nothing more.
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